The Ruins (Spoilers)

!!This review contains spoilers!!

Went to see The Ruins last night.... Nice. Before going to the movie, someone told me it was terrible, so naturally I got excited. Bear in mind that I like bad movies, cause I really liked this one.

I mean really, who doesn't like screaming plants, Mayans, and pretty girls cutting themselves. I gave this one a 3 on gore, however, had the gore they included pervaded more of the movie, I would have given it a better score cause it was awesome, only very brief. Two visions that won't leave my mind anytime soon: 1) The dude who just got his legs broken, and watching the bones get pulled out of the ragged muscles left over; and 2) Laura Ramsey cutting into her thigh, and then digging into it with her fingers.... Awesome.

What wasn't awesome, but very B-Movie-ish, the most annoying grrl (who, by the way never wanted to be there in the first place) is the only one that lives. Granted, that grrl was Jena Malone who is all over hollywood right now, but still.

Watching these types of situations - you know - where people are faced with imminent death if they don't problem solve pronto, always makes me think of what I would have done in their place. So here it is: 1) I would definately tried to electrocute the plant with the crank generator. I mean come on, there was no chance they could have burned down the temple with the minimal wood available. 2) Had all attempts failed to escape, I so would have start chucking pieces of vine all over the villagers and jungle. Those fools should really build like a fence or something. If I'm going to die, I'm going to take down as much of civilization as I can! Muah ha ha ha


Plot- 3
Directing- 2
Acting- 3
Cinematography- 1 cheap photoshop
Gore- 3

Intermission

So I thought I'd explain my brief hiatus from blogging in case there is even one person out there who is interested....*cough*

Well to tell you the truth, it really just hasn't been a priority. I've mostly been worried about, and trying to plan for the up coming economic depression. Granted, a large part of that plan involves going to Graduate school in San Francisco and adding to my debt.... =/ not smart I know. However I'm hoping it will open some opportunities to get the fuck out of this country post graduation...

Other then that I have been catching up on hella T.V., which, while it has a place in this blog, I feel less inclined to write about for some reason. Got to catch up on Planet Earth: awesome, Gankutsuo: awesome as well, Doctor Who: amazing, and I read all of the Hellsing Manga in like two days. That comic book is just mind blowing, captivating, and in general bad ass.

Some Japanese TV I cannot stop watching (I'm so addicted in fact I watch the raw versions as they come out even though I have a first grader's understanding of the Japanese language): Bleach, Naruto: Shippuuden, xxx-Holic, Soul Eater (brand new and amazingly drawn), and of course the Hellsing: Ultimate OVA's. I also read all the manga associated with said shows O_o

I'm out buddy, and I'm not your friend guy.

PS. I hope you saved your gold already... It looks like it will close today at $945 per ounce, but it peaked over $1K a month ago!!

Juno

So it has been almost two months since I've posted.... =/ I have been watching, maybe too much.

So I finally saw Juno last night. Took me long enough. Goddess, Ellen Page is so fucking awesome! (Happy 21st by the way as of Feb Ellen) Why is everything that is good in america Canadian? oh yeah, cause they are cooler than us, and not just climate related coolness. I'm not quite used to the long hair, but after I go see Smart People, I might change my tune.

Anyway, Jason Reitman directed this. He has started to make a name for himself with such films as Thank You For Smoking and In God We Trust, not to mention directing the first episode of the american version of The Office. I have one beef concerning Juno however: That is the runners at the close curtain of the film. If this was only a visual element meant to tie in the theme of the runners throughout the movie, then shame on you Jason. By having Bleeker not running, he is implying that he quit the team. Dong-Ma? However he just set a personal record for the 800 meter like a few scenes before the end. Are we to understand that he quit to start a music career with Juno? [remove tongue from cheek]

Speaking of Bleeker, Micheal Cera is fucking awesome as well. For those of you unfamiliar with his work, go to you local video store and rent Arrested Development right now!

The music was great, mostly the Moldy Peaches.... who disappeared a while back...


Plot- 4
Directing- 4
Acting- 5
Cinematography- 4
Gore- N/A